Thursday, January 31

Fatso update

No, I don't really think I'm fat. I feel fat though. I feel... big. Remember those stretch panel pants I loved sooo much a couple of months ago? Now they're too tight. And my new so-called maternity bikini panties? They started digging into my scar so now they're useless to me, serving no purpose other than sitting pretty on my undie shelf. So sad, too. They were my favorites. This makes me want to cry like Mr. Wong. A-boo-woo-woo-woooo.

Today's doctor appointment was the fabulous glucose test. You drink this too-sweet drink and wait an hour, then they take your blood and hire little fairies to swim in it and tell you if you're a prego diabetic. *sound of fairy bells tinkling* It was such a beautiful day outside, I'm glad I had somewhere to go. Otherwise I never would have known how nice the weather was. However, I must admit if it wasn't for my phone ringing, I would have slept right through my appointment. Nice to get out of the house, yes, but I curse the things that interrupt my chance for an afternoon nappy-time break. Right now I believe I'm actually so tired that I'm not going to walk to the bedroom. I'm going to lie down on the blankets out here and sleep on the sofa tonight. Sweet dreams...

Tuesday, January 29

You know you're hungry when...

you eat banana bread without cutting yourself a slice.

Yesterday I thought Frank might be coming home for the night, so I made him some banana bread. He can honestly do without a lot of my cooking. He's a chef. Well, he was a chef when we met, but still he can make a meal in the time it would take me to chop the veggies. It just doesn't make sense for me to be the cook around here. But he loves when I bake stuff. Mr. "I Don't Like Sweets" will hide in the bedroom eating my chocolate chip cookies by the fistful. One of his favorites is my banana bread. We fight over it. I had to start making two loaves at a time. One for me, one for him. Mine is half gone.

Somehow I used up all my clean knives today. Rather than washing one, I picked up my bread, sat down on the sofa, and started picking away chunk by chunk. It's officially my new way to eat banana bread. It's not the prettiest picture, I'm sure, but I feel better doing it this way rather than debating cutting another slice every time I finish one. "Should I have another piece?" Yes, silly. By giving the bread its own spot next to me on the sofa and picking at it, I'm saving water and I don't have to keep going back to the kitchen. You know what, though... this definitely isn't helping my chin chub situation.

Zzzzzz...

I've officially hit the third trimester tired zone. I've hit the hungrier and thirstier zones as well. Can't get enough rolled up romaine leaves with tiny drips of Newman's Own Creamy Caesar. I've been thinking weird thoughts about food lately. I've decided the banana and the avocado are fruit cousins based on form and texture (weird inedible peel with mushable insides). Grapes and cherries are half-brothers. I just don't know where to put watermelon. He's kind of like the Pope. No family to speak of, no relations other than the one he shares with his creator.

People sometimes ask if I have any weird cravings. Last time around, I had to have access to elephant ears at all times. If Randolph's wasn't open, I could still go to the Sage Diner for a fix. The only really weird thing I ate was BBQ Fritos with chunky peanut butter, but that was just one time. On Sunday night Frank went into the kitchen to make fried rice. It's a Frank specialty. We have a rice cooker so we make extra and put it in the fridge for when he wants to make a quick meal late at night. *** Side note: it's 9:12pm and my neighbor is downstairs hammering something into her wall. Thanks, asshole, you know I've got a toddler sleeping up here.*** So the other night we were eating our fried rice (excellent as usual) and it dawned on me that I've got my weird food habit for baby #2 -- fried rice with a big spoon of sour cream. It just seems to be the one thing that makes the rice just right. Right enough for me to eat two or three bowls full.

Monday, January 28

They make you so darn proud

Today Nico made his first crayon drawing. I've never been more proud. It's an interpretive piece, really... mostly scribbly lines and primary colors. Very Cy Twombly, circa 2000. And to show how much he really doesn't give a hoot what you think of his art, Nico finished the piece by ripping the paper clean in half and bit the tip off the yellow crayon. Radical.

Saturday, January 26

Events of the day

Well it's been just me, Nico and Livi around the house for a few days. This morning Nico woke at 6:45am, in a good mood, in dry pj's. We had scrambled eggs with baby spinach and Vermont cheddar, soy milk and bananas. For a few days I've been putting off going to Target because I've been too tired. Mainly I needed to pick up some thank-you notes because my printer sucks big donkey balls. I'm also trying to cross things off my running prep-the-house-for-new-baby-time list... bulbs for the recessed lights, kitchen trash bags, dental floss... things I don't want to have to think about for a while that I can do now and get out of the way.

When I leave the house, even if it's just to go to the store, I like to try to look nice even if I feel crappy. Clean clothes, hair done or at least neatly pulled back, a little make-up. There's this trend I've been noticing recently. I don't have Uggs, but I think they're cute. What is un-cute is that I see all these perfectly fine looking women (grown-ups who should know better) wearing what seem to be the grossest clothes they own with their Uggs. They go out in dirty sweat pants and big t-shirts with stains, wrap a ratty scarf around their neck, and try to offset it with a pair of Uggs. I want to stop them and tell them just because you spend over a hundred dollars on a pair of boots doesn't mean you shouldn't pay attention to the rest of your outfit. Cute shoes deserve a little effort on the rest of the package. I don't think anyone I know does this, at least not to the degree of what I've been seeing around here lately. There seems to be an Ugg/sneaker confusion going on. But I digress. Trying to look decent when I leave the house makes me feel so much better once I'm in the groove and having fun with Nico. He likes going out. He waves to the other kids and says hello. Or "Ay-oooo". And even though I feel big and uncomfortable and sooo badly need a nap, I also feel cute walking through the store with my Nico and my baby belly. I love going out with them. Lately, though, we're usually done after one store. No more Target and Wegmans and wherever else. It's one stop, then home to pee pee!

Is anyone else watching "Celebrity Rehab with Dr. Drew"? OMG how freakin' sexy is Dr. Drew?! I'm having my lunch break -- Whopper Jr. with cheese, no mayo, no onion, extra pickles... small fries and peppermint pie -- and after the last 10 minutes of "My Fair Brady: Maybe Baby" they have the latest episode of "Rehab" and it seems Dr. Pinsky is even cuter than he was last week. I just want to reach out and touch him. Inappropriately. Well anyway, I'm done lunch and I'm going to try to snooze a little before Nico wakes up again. I'm going to make some chicken veggie soup, then call Mom to see if she's feeling better. We're supposed to go to brunch tomorrow for her birthday if she's up for it. If not I'll just stay home and try to get more things done. Possibly even screw in a couple of the new light bulbs I bought today.

Wednesday, January 23

What's this?

That's what I said when I was looking in the mirror this morning. As usual I woke up when Frank got up for work at 6:40, and I was a little more awake than usual just because I wanted to see him and talk to him before he left. He's been working a lot of overtime the past week and a half. He was home one night last week, then he didn't make it back until late Saturday night. He worked from home on Sunday, then I didn't see him again until last night. So I miss him, and I know Nico does too because on Monday he was standing at the gate trying to look down the staris, saying, "Dadada dada dadadada." Last night I kept the baby up late so Frank could see him, and I've never seen Nico hug anyone tighter.

I had really wanted to shower last night, but it was 1:30 when I finished working and I just didn't feel like it at that point. For months I've been so itchy all over my body. At first I blamed it on the new Cocoa Butter Body Butter formula (gross) and a new fabric softener, but I quit both about five months ago and I still get these itchy spells where nothing helps. I asked Dr. Cortese about it in November and he said it happens with mamas, usually due to dry skin. The good Dr. suggested I try some Vaseline Intensive Care. I think you can tell by the choice of lotions that Dr. Cortese is a man. Not that I'm knocking Vaseline. I use it all the time. I just thought it was cute he suggested that as a super moisturizing cream. Men. Anyhoo, I was awake enough to know I really needed a shower and I had some extra time since the baby went to sleep late. Extra time meaning that instead of waking at 7:00, he might give me til 7:45 for a change. So I hopped in the shower and as I was tucking in my hair towel turban I looked in the mirror and there was something extra I hadn't noticed before. Chin chub. *gasp!*

It's probably been there for a while... but I keep checking on it as the day progresses and it doesn't seem to be disappearing. It wasn't the way I was holding my head up. Even if I tilt back a little, the little chin pooch is still there... hmm... too many sticky buns I suppose. Just one more reason I can't wait to get back to normal, or whatever the new normal will be after April.